Thursday, 15 December 2011

Do good things come to those that wait?

They say that patience is a virtue.

Well I never once said I was virtuous (check my blog posts, not one mention of virtue anywhere, I promise you)

Yesterday (which is actually today as I am writing this Wednesday night, confused? stick around, it can only get worse) I found out I had a parcel delivered which went to my neighbour.

By the time I found out this parcel had been delivered, (which incidentally wasn't by the courier company because they neglected to put a card through my door, Thanks Fedex, glad I can help you contribute to saving the environment one piece of card at a time) my neighbour had gone out.

Now I don't known where the hell she has gone but it is 9.45pm and I am pacing like a worried parent because she still isn't back. (I really should put this woman on a curfew)

and I'm not sure but I think I can hear my parcel weeping through the walls!!! What kind of rude person takes in a parcel for you and then goes out until it's late. It is a school night!, I want my parcel and she has kidnapped it.

I think I am well within my rights here to kick down her door and go and rescue my parcel from her evil clutches. I could say that I smelt smoke or something and while I was in there checking the house for any fires (what a hero) I thought I might as well take my parcel at the same time. (See what a considerate neighbour I am) Erm, their is cake missing from your fridge? Nothing to do with me I promise (wipes crumbs)

I have zero patience, if I knew where my birthday presents were I would open them,
and then re wrap them so no-one knew. I am terrible like that. I can't wait for anything.

It is why I rarely online shop. Wait for delivery? Hell no (especially with the parcel snatcher next door) I want to buy it and take it with me. I hear you can sometimes die of old age before your ASOS parcels arrive anyway!!!

I am really unhappy about my neighbour going out while being in charge of my Japonesque parcel. She wouldn't leave my child unsupervised, what is the difference? (I think I'm looking forward to receiving this parcel more to be honest, If she was in charge of my children, I would be the one out and uncontactable) I have been in since 2pm ish. So she has been out for almost 8 hours without a care in the world for my parcel!!! She probably hasn't left it any water or room to roam around. (and if her small dog has even LOOKED at my parcel while hearing the sound of a running tap I will make ear muffs out of it)

If she is much longer I will have to pull the tumble drier trick on the next parcel I take in for her. (ten minutes on a cool setting, thud, thud, thud, thud, round and round it goes, will it break? who the hell knows)

I am waiting for my parcel from Japonesque and quite honestly I am really excited to be receiving it. This wait is half killing me.

Like I said, I'm not a patient person.

What would you be doing in my position? 

Anyone care to help me burglarise back my own property? I have to be within my rights to go and rescue it don't I?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x


  1. I've been waiting since 30th for a debenhAms parcel, which they're resending, since last Friday for a random unknown parcel carded by a random courier, plus 8 eBay parcels... Oh, and the one that was carded from the postman yesterday could be anything....

    I'm not patient either...!

  2. Sing Hosanahs!!!! I am exactly the same. Impatient old lady?? That is me waiting for a package to arrive.

    I nearly had kittens when I found out an old neighbour opened and started using products out of a package that was left with her because I wasn't there!!! She thought it was stuff she had won. Never mind that the package was CLEARLY Marked with my Name!!!!! Needless to say I don't live next to her anymore...

  3. ALWAYS send to the office... helps if you have an office to send to...

    I never ever ever send anything to my flat - half the time my own letters end up in the recycling!


  4. Love this!! My old postman had a habit of not telling us which neighbour our parcel was with so we basically had to walk up and down the street seeing who had it :(

  5. LAUGHING SO HARD!!! So glad I can I have my packages delivered to my aunt's house around the corner from my house; there is always someone at the house and I can pick my parcel up asap.

  6. *sigh* The lost parcel I know it well.
    I have been waiting 4 days for 2 cases of wine (very very important items I'm sure you'll agree) Tesco just seem to want to drive it about the UK (culture it, or maybe mature it more?!) When I call they tell me it's on the van, but this van never arrives....oh tell a lie they did attempt delivery. 10.39pm the other my office address. That's some serious overtime!!

  7. Call the police and say you smell gas. Or that you heard shootings from next door. And then admit that it was the tv or that you've been trying perfumes all day long, so you can't smell right. Parcel snatchers must go to jail. Ha!

  8. I had to play postman chicken the other day. I had a card for a parcel I'd missed so I had to go to the post office to collect it... but I was waiting for more parcels to be delivered. I was convinced that whatever time I chose to go and get the parcel I'd come home to find another of those bloody red cards on the doormat.

  9. My entire Christmas is "in transit" well not my entire Christmas, I am still fighting with OH about whether or not £60 is an insane amount of money to spend on a sparrow, shoved inside a penguin, whacked into a buzzard or whatever a 3 bird roast is. So I haven't ordered that yet. But pretty much everything for the kids comes via a courier. So I lay awake stressing until its ordered, then I lay awake stressing that it might snow/the couriers van might catch fire (over night whilst the van driver is safely in his bed I hasten to add)/or the supplier might totally have underestimated the number of lazy arsed women who wont shop in real life and have ordered xmas from him and will run out of stock. And then it all arrives and I start stressing about making my chestnut stuffing in time.

  10. The postman had a parcel for me the other day and I couldnt find the keys to open my door (turns out my partner had taken all keys to work). It was awful as postman then left it outside my door for me to see - but I was a prisoner in my own house! Ended up having to get keys delivered in a taxi and it wasnt even for me - it was for him!!!

  11. I would hate to have my package held hostage by an absent neighbor. I hope that by now you've got it. I'm curious to hear what was in it. I hope you give a full description. Sleep well tonight.


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