Tuesday, 31 January 2012

Week Four weigh in

Well I'm just going to come out and say it.

I didn't lose any weight this week.

I didn't put any on either, but trust me that is not going to make me happy at this exact moment.

I'm annoyed, I admit it.  I've been a good girl, I have. and if I am putting in the effort to not eat crap then I fully expect my body to reward me by shedding a couple of pounds. I don't think I am asking too much do you? It isn't as though I don't have a lot to lose, surely my body could have given up just one pound, just to be NICE to me to for once.

I was extremely worried about this weigh in, purely because I have spent this whole week shovelling hard core pain killers down my throat like they were smarties (Mmmmmmmmmm, smarties) and I have to wonder whether these have had an effect on my weight loss this week.

I haven't eaten any differently to how I usually do either. So yes I am pretty upset over staying the same weight.

Now this is where it gets interesting.

I got off the scales, kicked them and gave them a filthy look (as you do) and my instant response was to run to Sainsburys and buy the biggest bar of chocolate they stock and eat it all in one sitting.

That is what I would usually do anyway.

But I didn't. I bought mushrooms instead (I'm such a rebel)

So perhaps this is what my body is trying to teach me this week. New habits, I can lose weight any time, but I know I still have so much to learn and change about my lifestyle.
The old Kellie would turn and reach for the things that are bad for you when something goes wrong, but this time I didn't.

So perhaps I did shed something after all?

Another layer of the old Kellie has gone, revealing part of the new Kellie that I am striving to reach. It isn't just about the weight loss, it is about learning to undo the old habits and make new ones,

This isn't a fairytale ending, I know that I will come up against this again in the future but I have this week as a foundation. I didn't crack and give into temptation. I carried on with the new healthy lifestyle and I hope to be rewarded for it next week.

Now does anyone want a mushroom? I seem to have lots.

Big Fashionista x x x

The joke that just isn't funny.

Yesterday I took a little walk over to the Facebook page of Glossybox (review of Januarys box coming soon)

First point I need to make. Wow, the GlossyBox UK social media team deserve a medal, I imagine that the pub nearby to their office does a roaring lunchtime trade, (next time I'm nearby guys, I'll buy you a drink. hell, I'll buy you a bottle)

Second point. Let's talk about mental illness.

Now I know that seems like kind of a jump but let me start at the beginning and hopefully it will soon make sense (I did say hopefully)

Yesterday someone I respect posted a comment on the Glossybox UK page. Not everyone had to agree with it, It just so happened that I did.

But one class-less person replied.

"*****, has the nuthouse let u out on day release"

Words absolutely failed me, (actually, they didn't but you know what I mean)

Doesn't mental illness have enough of a stigma surrounding it without people using it as an insult?

Is it any wonder that some people with depression, schizophrenia, anxiety or other forms of mental illness are still concerned in this day and age to share what they are going through?

My reply to this person? (I really can't bring myself to type lady, I'm sorry I can't)

I sincerely hoped that a member of her family never had to go through the trauma of mental illness as she would obviously have no sympathy for them, I explained that it is people like her that help create the stigma of mental illness. and then I walked away.

Her reply?

"It's a joke for effs sake"

Ooooooooooh a joke?

Did I just forget to find it funny?

Oh, I get it now. (I actually told her next time to start with something simple like a knock knock joke and build up to something more difficult like how does the chicken cross the road)

So we can say what we like now as long as we add the words "it's a joke"?

We can be cruel, we can be cutting, we can try to rebuild walls that places such as MIND, SANE, Blurt Alerts and The Samaritans have spent years trying to knock down?

We can make insinuations that people are mad, insane, should be locked away, as a joke?



Let's not go back to that time when people were scared to talk about mental illness,

Mental illness should not be suffered in silence, and people should not be making jokes about it, trying to force people to once more see it as something shameful they need to hide from the world.

It needs to be kept in the open, people should be able to talk through their problems and issues without the fear of someone trying to shame them into silence.

I will not stand by quietly while someone tries to make mental illness once more something to be ashamed of by using it as a "joke"

And I hope neither do you.

Let me know your thoughts.

Big Fashionista x x

Monday, 30 January 2012

Sorry Monday,

Dear Monday,

I've checked my schedule and I'm really sorry but today isn't good for me. I seem to have double-booked you. I know, I know, It's not your fault. It's mine.

I take full responsibility for not being ready for you this week. What can I say, my organisational skills are not what they should be. I do feel terrible about it, I think if my memory serves me correctly I may well have tried to cancel on you once or twice before. (okay, possibly every week since time began) but COME ON Monday, you are just crowding me now.

Every week? You try to visit more than my mother does!!! (and are just as welcome. Kidding mother, I'm kidding) Monday, it is just that you are so NEEDY, every week you come back like a glutton for punishment. You are like a bouncy little puppy around my ankles, getting all excited and begging me to play (please don't wee on my shoes this time) it really doesn't matter how often I update my Facebook status telling you to jog on, you just never get the hint. (You remind me of an ex)

I prefer your mate, Tuesday. Not as much as Friday, (or Saturday, Sunday, Wednesday or Thursday for that fact) I must admit, Friday knows how to party. Friday is a true finisher. Monday? meh not so much. You are the beginning.......................

and I don't think I'm finished with last week yet, I don't have time in my diary to begin a whole new week.

So Monday, I seem to have double-booked you with a weekend.

Um, my bad.

Lets try again next week.................................

Oh god I'm sorry, I think I may be washing my hair next week...

Can we both get out our diarys and try to find a time that is convenient for us both?

I think I have a space in March...... Oh hang on, I think my mother is visiting then.

Raincheck Monday?

Anyone else find Monday a bit needy?

or do you welcome the opportunity to start a clean slate each week?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Sunday, 29 January 2012

Blog Takeover

Morning all you lovely lot,

So I have had an idea, It's nearly February, there is a strong chance of snow and some of us out there are crazed with hunger and dieting

We need a distraction.

So why not have a blog swap?

I'm not talking about swapping pretties, (or children-although if anyone wants mine? Anyone?) I'm talking about a blog takeover.

A group of bloggers all swapping blogs and guest posting on someone elses blog all on the same day.

Now you don't have to be a beauty blogger to take part, I'm looking for bloggers from all walks of life, Tech blogs, cooking blogs, parent blogs, It doesn't matter.

It also isn't important how many blog followers you have. What I am going to do is put everyones name in a bag and pull them out blind so that it will all be down to chance.

I think this is a great way to introduce your blog to a wider audience, a great way to make new blog friends and build upon our audiences.

It is still in the early stages at the moment but firstly I want to make a list of everyone who may be interested.

Leave your name below and I will add you to the list, if you are on twitter leave your twitter name so I have a way of reaching you.

Let's have some fun with this

Are you interested?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Saturday, 28 January 2012

Small business Weekend, Open promotion

As you all know lately I have been blogging at the weekends promoting small businesses and it is something I really enjoy doing. There are a lot of companies out there that need our support, times are hard and if big companies like Peacocks can go under then it must be a hell of a lot more worrying for small businesses who are struggling to keep afloat.

I have a shoulder injury at the moment which has been dragging me down, (Torn rotator cuff, not nice) My cortisone injection has worn off completely and I can't get another appointment until March so I am currently experimenting with lots of lovely different pain killers to try to deaden the pain a bit.

The problem is that leaves me with the attention span of a goldfish,(Ooooooooh shiny) and left to me I would probably write about how everything was "amazing" or "fluffy"
(Seriously, someone needs to take this keyboard off of me before I start telling you stories about lepri, leper, leprachauns or something)

So let's try something different today


Want some extra promotion?

Then tell me a bit about your company in the comments, spam me with links to your site, promote yourself, I'm turning my comments over to you so my readers can take a look at your site and hopefully find a new company that they love and want to buy lots of your beautiful products.

I look forward to reading about your sites x x x

Let me know about your company

Big Fashionista

Friday, 27 January 2012

Nom or Vom

Look at me, I'm calm, in fact I am so calm I may as well just piss glitter and fart rainbows.
(The painkillers have now kicked in, if I go off topic, just push me gently in the right direction-thanks)

Um, where were we?

Ah yes, Friday. Nom or Vom.

Thursday morning I was listening to the radio and I hear the crazy dulcet tones of Nicolas Cage.

Oh that voice, that voice............. (Swoon)

Even his voice was enough to make me melt,

And let us not forget he does do crazy very very well. (I do like crazy)

Let me show you some pictures of the one and only................

Nicolas Cage

So Ladies & Gentlemen,

Nicolas Cage?

Nom or Vom?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Thursday, 26 January 2012

Blog competitions? Good Idea or just free ads?

A little while ago I covered Blog Awards right here on my blog, I had a humourous dig at the magazines involved while trying to keep it all fluffy and light and quite friendly. (For me any way)

Since my little rant I have discovered that the latest blog award is going to be held at breakfast time. I won't lie, I think I let out a small wee due to laughing so hard in disbelief. There is nothing like holding the award ceremony in the morning to make a blogger feel special is there? (Keeps the alcohol budget down I suppose)

But let me put that to one side for just a minute to discuss another way that I feel bloggers are being exploited.

Blog competitions.

Or as I like to think of them, Free ads for the companies and yet another way for companies to drive YOUR traffic towards their site and increase their visitors.

"For your chance to win free shoes for a year, all you have to do is blog a short article on your favourite pair of shoes from our site"

(Hang on, isn't that an unpaid SPONSORED POST? An AD?)

Yes these companies can offer great prizes,

(Of course they can, they don't have to spend any of their advertising budget this quarter do they? Bloggers are doing it for them)

When a company offers a great prize then obviously bloggers are going to enter in droves. As with blog awards I really don't blame any blogger for entering.

I blame the companies for feeling that they can take advantage of us.

If companies are TRULY looking for a quality blogger then why not ask bloggers to write a short article on how wonderful their products are and then e-mail it in to the company?

 That is what you do if you are looking for quality and not just a raised profile and increased traffic to your site.

And to say any different is in my opinion, just patronising.

The company I saw yesterday doing exactly this has also taken it that one step further.

Once they have reaped the rewards of having bloggers post their free ads praising their shoes they will then choose the top five and then those five will have to "THRASH IT OUT ON TWITTER" (their words, not mine) and ask people to vote for them,

The one with the most votes, wins.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh a popularity contest?

Always a good way to get bloggers on side (add sarcastic face here)

Personally I don't think Blog competitions are a good thing. You may think differently, I would love to hear your opinions please.

And I've just had an interesting thought, Do you think I could enter this blog post as a competition entry?


Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Moral Superiority

Working from home has its advantages, and one of those advantages has to be the option of feeling morally superior to the plebs who appear on Jeremy Kyle every morning.

Let us be honest here, it really isn't difficult to feel morally superior to a Jeremy Kyle guest is it?

Even my cats feel superior to a JK guest, and they lick their own bums clean. My cats that is, not the Jeremy Kyle guests (although there was that one contestant.......)

Where shall I start?

Firstly, What sort of person decides to air their dirty laundry in public anyway?

You don't think the baby is YOURS?

Let's call Jeremy Kyle, He can sort it out, In fact, bring the whole family, have an away day, bring a scrunchie, have a party.

While we are on the subject of scrunchies, let's talk fashion sense. Now if someone held a gun to my head and told me I HAD to appear on Jeremy Kyle or else, then I would damn well make sure I looked my best, and I'm not talking about getting my best tracksuit cleaned and polishing my sovereigns (And that's just the women) I have yet to see a guest on Jeremy Kyle make a real effort, Now someone may object to me saying this and bleat that the production team persuade the guests to "keep it real" and dress down.

I would be the (unwilling) guest arguing that yes I do wear these Louboutins to do the weekly shop in ACTUALLY, and the only way I wouldn't be wearing them is if a producer tore them from my cold dead feet.


But no, the Jeremy Kyle guests roll up like they are late for the school run, and then proceed to tear strips out of each other like fishwives, It is perfect morning television for if you are feeling grotty and low, if you have had a row with your partner or just if you want to sneer at chavs.

It is the human equivalent of watching animals in a zoo, the only thing missing is the occasional faeces throwing (Although they may have cut that bit out, who knows) it gives us a chance to see people at their worst. I really don't know what drives people to think that airing their problems on a TV show can help.

Can you imagine your child in the future finding out that there was doubts about who their daddy was? From reruns of Jeremy Kyle on Watch or Dave 15 years down the line? For me as a normal person that just doesn't bear thinking about. The difference is the people who DO appear, really don't give a stuff, in fact it probably doesn't even cross their tiny little minds.

I am just positively moist with moral superiority aren't I?

You should try it, just don't get too sucked in.

And if you start googling scrunchies, let me know,

I'll just add you to the list of people I can feel morally superior too.

Do you watch it?

Let me know your feelings on the programme.

Big Fashionista x x

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

Week Three weigh-in

Week three already?

That has gone quick.

Im starting to see results now in my actual figure, clothes are fitting me a lot better, and some which didn't fit me at all I can now get into.

I have measured myself and in three weeks I have lost 3 inches off my bust (Not entirely sure I'm happy with that) 2" off my waist and 2" off my hips too.

I'm not going to give you a lesson about dieting here, let's face it, we know what we have to do it is just about putting those lessons into practice. I finally got myself in a place where I was ready to diet again and I'm really glad that I did.

How did I do this week?

I lost another 3lb.

Making 12lb in three weeks.

Hoping to lose another 3lb next week so I can say I have now lost 1 stone something,

I haven't given myself a target weight and I never will do. I find that if I do that when I get close to it I seem to panic and self-sabotage myself. I am just going week by week and stone by stone. I will know when I am ready to just start maintaining instead of losing.

How has your week been if you are dieting too?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x x

Keep calm, KEEP CALM?

Like Katie Price in her Jordan phase and Heidi & Seals wedding planner, I guess some things just come to the end of their usefulness.

I'm talking about the phenomenon that is

Ok, it was cute at first, then it just seemed to turn into a mild case of Thrush (slightly annoying and difficult to get rid of) but now it turned into a monster.

Cups, teatowels, little BBM icons, everywhere I turn I'm being told to Keep Calm.

I REALLY don't like being told what to do.

There is a man in my house?

I know what I will do,

Keep Calm

and possibly eat cupcakes or something kitsch and quirky like that.

Nope, what I would probably do is Keep Calm and Keep Shooting, Wonder if there is a poster for that?


Keep calm? What if I don't want to Keep Calm? I don't really like calm anyway. And if I'm being told to keep calm then the chances are I'm going to go Bat-shit crazy just for the hell of it.

Apparently, as long as I Keep Calm I can do anything that I want to do,

Buy Shoes

Eat Cake

Go Shopping

Drink Tea

The world is my lobster as long as I Keep Calm...........

Do you think Anger Management therapists are aware of this fact? It would certainly make therapy a lot quicker and easier if they just handed out little postcards, or in group therapy everyone sat around drinking coffee out of Keep Calm Mugs.
(I imagine someone in the NHS is out there now taking notes-Using a Keep Calm pen I bet ya)

Personally I've had enough of this crap now.

Yes it was fun, it was a brilliant piece of nostalgia that deserved to be revisited but for the love of BLOG, let it go.

Let us all take one more sip from our mugs, wipe something up with our teatowels and salute our postcards,

But if you don't start letting it go and moving on, it is gonna take a hell of a lot more that a Keep Calm poster to actually Keep me Calm,

Consider yourself warned.

And Eat Cake if you must (Save me a slice though)

What do you think, Is it time to move on or are you still getting pleasure from the Keep Calm phenomenon?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Monday, 23 January 2012

Suits you sir

I have a fetish (Ok, I have lots, what can I say, I'm bad to the bone) and there is nothing guaranteed to make me go weak at the knees (erm, does that sound WRONG?) quicker than a man................. (hang on, there's more, I am slightly more discerning than a Take Me Out contestant where the only requirements seem to be a pulse and a good pair of shoes. Shoes optional)

A man in a suit.

Now I don't mean any man in a suit. I like a man in a suit that doesn't usually wear a suit, but when he needs to wear that suit, he can wear it with arrogance and the knowledge he looks good. (daaaaaaaaaamn good)

Unfortunately I live in East London, The one suit man of East London rarely owns his suit for going out, he has his suit for going away, The court appearance suit. (Which can also handily double as a funeral suit) It isn't an expensive well cut suit by any means, the shirt isn't a beautifully thick shirt with which he can wear cufflinks (usually the sleeves are quite loose so they can be pushed up for handcuffs) and the chances are it was bought on the advice of his "brief" who advised him to smarten up his act.

If a man is going to own just one suit then it needs to be a good one, If I'm going to look you up and down and imagine you shrugging off the jacket and slooooowly unbuttoning the shirt to the tune of Nickelback Rockstar (That's a whole other story) then I don't want to be dazzled by the shinyness of your cheap suit. That is not going to float my boat in any way shape or form.

A man in a suit is sexy, Especially when you aren't used to seeing him in one. Think a bit of rough, Statham, Vin Diesel, All suited and booted ready to sweep you off your feet?

Just one word of advice one suit guy.

Wear a "comedy" tie with your suit and I WILL tie you up with it.

(And not in a good way)

What do you think, A man in a suit? Does it work for you?

Let me know.

Big Fashionista x x

Sunday, 22 January 2012

Rockalily Lipsticks

There are certain things that ALL women should own, Matching underwear, heels that you can't stand up in, the same handbag in different colours.....

and a kick-arse red lipstick.

I have all of the above, except for the red lipstick bit, I will be honest with you, I get confused by tones, shades, I don't know whether I need to go for a scarlett red, or a pink red or a brown red.

But there is a website out there that is trying to help.

www.rockalily.com are bringing you red lipsticks in shades that suit everyone. Four core shades that cover everyones individual style.

And it always helps that ReeRee Rockette has the COOLEST style I know.

Take a look.

The four core shades are beautiful but Rockalily have taken it that that one step further and have introduced a limited collection of more shades which are just as beautiful.
even the names are achingly cool.

Sailors Beware
Mans Ruin
Vintage Vixen

And I can't write this without mentioning the upcoming collaboration between Rockalily and gorgeous blogger The London Lip Gloss, look out for ZOMG coming soon.

You can buy the lipsticks at www.rockalily.com

Go and take a look and tell me what your favourite is. I think Roulette Red is mine.

Let me know yours

Big Fashionista x x

Saturday, 21 January 2012

Lovely Vintage Emporium

At the weekend I like to feature small businesses on the internet that I think would be of interest to people who read my blog.

And I have noticed that you the readers have style, taste and are serious about fashion. Now whether you are a huge fan of all things vintage or the sort of person that thinks a piece of classic, well made designer vintage can add that something extra to your wardrobe you NEED to check out my favourite Vintage website Lovelys Vintage

Owned and ran by Lynnette, whom, I adore, this site has something for EVERYONE, from jewellery to scarves all the way through to rare Chanel and Jackets. Every piece is sourced by Lynnette and she definitely knows her stuff.

Want to see some of the products currently available from Lovelys Vintage ?

Of course you do.

Now bear with me as this next part is quite picture heavy, I kept finding more things that I wanted to show you. I love absolutely everything I am showing you here.

Everything you see here is currently available from Lovelys Vintage, but if you see something you like, get in there fast, things go very quickly.

Another thing I love about Lovelys Vintage site is Lynnettes blog, always informative, always fun and always a really great read. Go take a look by clicking ----> HERE

So run my little vintage fashionistas, run and see for yourself the beauty of Lovelys Vintage. Tell me what you love about the site, and if you buy anything, come back and let me know what you bought and what you intend to wear it with.

Don't forget to let me know x  x x

Big Fashionista x x

Friday, 20 January 2012

Nom or Vom

Looking for these sizzling hot men is getting harder and harder I must admit.

I know, I know, I'm not going to get any sympathy for combing the internet for pictures of hot men purely in the name of research,  (Hard life and all that,)

This weeks Nom or Vom was suggested to me today and the minute I heard his name I thought YES (Yes, yes, oooooooooooh yes., lights cigarette)

Whether you love him as Jack Bauer or my personal favourite, David from The Lost Boys (He could've bitten me anytime, I wouldn't have put up a struggle) Keifer Sutherland has something about him that appeals to a wide range of females and males.

Ladies & Gentlemen

Kiefer Sutherland

Channelling his inner David Caruso (we should all do this more often I think *Takes off glasses to emphasise point*)

No words, just stare.

Mr Jack Bauer I presume?

Cheers Keifer, raises glass in agreement.

Ooooooooooh, Keifer, it's all flooding back how much I had a crush on you in this film. (checks I have dvd in cupboard)

So what do we think?

Keifer Sutherland?

Nom or Vom

Thursday, 19 January 2012

Blur-ring the lines

Oh Alex James, what has become of you?

I remember when you were achingly cool and despite being more of an Albarn girl myself I could respect that you were hip and forged in the fires of awesomeness.

Then you became addicted to cheese and we all worried as you turned your back on the hedonistic world of Brit Pop to dream up new fantastic types of cheese for us all to drool over.

(Personally I'd have preferred a new Blur album)

You basically became a cheese bore, a mini babybellend if you will. But we put up with it because part of us hoped that one day you would again help bring Brit pop back just like Justin Trousersnake brought the sexy back. (I do like some Brit pop)

Well that's never going to happen now.

Now I don't know if Mr James had a huge bill to pay, Perhaps had a lorryload of kumquats and potatoes coming for his next cheese invention and no way of paying for it but he wrote an article for The Sun newspaper basically extolling the virtues of fast food in a way that I never thought I would hear him or anyone else with a conscience do.

I really am hoping that the whole thing was tongue-in-cheek, (Or he had a gun at his head)  I have heard Alex James in the past raving over fresh, high quality food and how it is so important and yet now he is comparing McDonalds to a Michelin starred restaurant (I'm sure he wouldn't like it if I compared his cheese to Dairylea would he?)

And I do get the feeling that Alex James has "dumbed it down" for his audience, he occasionally slips in a comment about things such as Kentucky-fried Grouse or being "backstage" at a restaurant as if he is reminding us although he may be writing for his target audience, he can't help but remind people he isn't actually one of them. He is Alex James don't you know? (He makes cheese)

Am I disappointed that Alex James has come across as a sell-out?

Yes I am, the whole thing smacked of complete advertorial content.

If I wrote a post like that, I would have to disclose that it was a sponsored post, (Sponsored by Greggs? Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm, call me) But no, Alex James has wrapped it up in a pretty bow and handed it to readers as a completely independent study into fast food.

Which it obviously isn't,

I'm off to listen to Parklife and wait for Gordon Ramsey to realise he has been unfavourable compared to a spread from Greggs. Can't imagine that's going to go down well. A bit like your cheese hey Alex?

What do you think?

Was Alex James being honest in his article or do you think he may as well just get some Golden Arches tattoo'd on his arse and have done with it?

Let me know.

Big Fashionista x x

Wednesday, 18 January 2012

A friendly troll

This is a really hard post to write, In fact I think I have written and deleted the first paragraph about four times now.

Deep breathe and try again.

As a blogger I get invited to launches and press days quite a lot these days. I'm not bragging, it's just a statement of fact.

And my instant reaction to each invite is to immediately turn it down flat.

My problem is that I suffer from incredibly crippling shyness. The thought of meeting lots of amazing bloggers at an event fills me with such horror that I can turn almost rigid with fear.

Put me at a computer and I have an opinion on everything, I am loud, (hopefully funny) bossy and extremely opinionated. I write a good game,

(I'm like a friendly troll. One who uses her skills for good rather than evil)

But put me in a real life situation?  Yeah, I'm the one vomiting in a corner.

Are you surprised by my admission? 

I may come across as a confident person on my blog, but I always feel that in real life I will be a disappointment to people, I'm not going to be falsely modest here, I KNOW I can write. but I don't think I translate as well in real life. I'm a short little fat bird who desperately tries to melt in to the background because I think no-one would be interested in what I have to say.

I turn down events, I put off meeting incredible people and for that I apologise. (We must do lunch is probably my most over-used sentence ever) I really do want to meet people, and be a part of the blogging community, I just can't seem to get over that first hurdle of fear, so I isolate myself and I know that end the end the invites will tail off and I will have no-one to blame but myself.

I can't attend events in the evening at the moment as my family comes first but I have made a promise to myself that this is the year I need to overcome this shyness if I want to carry on.

I don't want to be a friendly troll anymore. I want to meet people and overcome my fears. (And not get to the door and then run away sobbing which believe it or not I have done before at a press day-silly cow)

I AM making a start. I have agreed to give a talk at Cybher UK in a couple of months and later on today I am doing something fun that as soon as I can, I will be telling you all about.

It's go BIG or go home.

I'm throwing myself in at the deep end.

And hopefully not throwing up in the deep end as well.

So share with me, does anyone else feel the same way? Or has anyone out there overcome their shyness?

Or does anyone just want to give me a hug?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Tuesday, 17 January 2012

Weigh in week 2

So here we are, week 2. it came around really fast this time. Whereas the first week dragged its arse like a dog with worms, this week I found myself with a lot more energy and the week has gone so much quicker.

I found that the cravings have been a lot easier to deal with as well. I still had a lot of times when I would have eaten your eyes for a bar of chocolate, but that went pretty fast and I found ways to distract myself easily whereas last week I would have cried (Ok, I did cry a couple of times)

One thing that I loved about this diet last time and it has helped me to settle in a lot easier and quicker this time is the way how it helps me to be inventive and creative. Whereas I used to choose pasta as a quick comfort food (Alright three packets of crisps, you got me) instead I am slicing peppers and onion and celery for a quick stir fry.

And I am enjoying it.

I am keeping up with my water intake as well to combat the vicious headaches I have been suffering and what I have been doing as well is drinking hot water instead of having coffee so I am lowering my caffeine intake considerably (That may explain my threat to eat peoples eyes, although that might just be me.)

One thing I have noticed this week is my usually bad skin is so so so much worse, I am suffering from quite painful sore spots at the moment and that does drag me down a lot. but I am trying to think of them as all the crap leaving my system and be positive about it instead of surfing the internet for a gimp mask (Never know when it would come in handy)

So how did I do this week?

I lost 3lb.

I wanted 4lb but I'm not going to complain, that is still 9lb in two weeks and I am in a really positive frame of mind whereas before I had been able to do a week of a diet and then I lose my willpower and fall off the wagon and land face first in a cream cake. Something has just clicked again this time and I am ready to get back in the saddle and keep going,

This week I am going to introduce some exercise into my new lifestyle and get back on my bike.

I love this new journey of 2012 and I am really willing to give it 100% and keep it up.

3lb off?

Yes I am happy with that. Roll on next week

Big Fashionista x x

Yacht a mistake

So the Education Secretary Michael Gove has called for the Queen to be honoured with a new yacht to celebrate her Jubilee has he?

Firstly, Well now you've just gone and ruined the surprise haven't you Mr Gove (You spoilsport)

Secondly,  If I was Mrs Gove and I had an anniversary coming up, I would certainly expect nothing less than a new car!!!

Anything less than that Mrs Gove and I would be banishing Michael to the spare house ASAP.

Can you imagine it if she got something for the house?  "So the QUEEN gets a yacht and I get a BLOODY Hoover? Oh hell no you cock."

I really don't know why people are so shocked that a member of parliament can get it so wrong and in these harsh and uneasy times call for the queen to be given a yacht.

Now I don't care whether it is coming out of my pocket or not, I really don't want to hear about someone receiving a yacht as a pressie. Hell I get jealous hearing that someone has received a new lipstick, a yacht is going to tip me over the edge. (and I'm teetering, teetering I tell you)

And who is going to wrap the bloody thing anyway????
(Don't look at me, I'm awful with sellotape)

The only way I can be on board with this yacht gift is if the queen receives it and then hands it back to the nation like a giant UK timeshare.

If that happens then I will gladly sing Happy Birthday and act all surprised when she unwraps it.

And then put my name down for August bank holiday 2013.

That's MY weekend ok?
Back off.

What do you think?

Will Mrs Gove be disappointed with her anniversary gift this year?

Should the Queen receive a new Yacht for her Jubilee

And does anyone know why the Education Secretary is getting involved in anything other that say, educationy sort of things?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Monday, 16 January 2012

Intro music

I have come to the conclusion over the weekend, I need an intro tune.

It's true, I do.

I have spent an unhealthy amount of time over this last week watching people on the TV walk into rooms to bangin' tunes, and I want IN.

Now I pretty much walk to the beat of a tune anyway, Have you ever seen Tony Manero strutting down the road in Stayin Alive?

Yeah THAT'S how I roll

(I actually don't, but please, just nod and agree with me here, leave me with just this one thing I beg you)

But when contestants on Take Me Out (Oh that is a whole other blog post for later on in the week) and darts players start to enter the room to songs such as Let Me Be Your Fantasy, Chelsea Dagger, Town Called Malice and Welcome To The Jungle................

I have to wonder why this doesn't happen for me on a daily basis.

I think it really should, don't you?

But then comes the worry of picking a tune. Would I have a signature tune that played instantly whenever I walked into a room, or would I be able to change my song depending on my mood. (some poor git is going to have to carry around a hell of a lot of CDs)

It's a tough one, A signature tune? Wow. That is building you up to a point where you have to prove your worth within seconds.

I'm leaning towards Bitch by Meredith Brookes.

I think I could find ways to live up to that one don't you?

What do you think?

Would you like a theme tune to accompany you whenever you entered a room?

What would be your intro tune?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Sunday, 15 January 2012

Diamonds & Daggers,

Before christmas I started a series at the weekends promoting small businesses that I thought were interesting and different. It is a hard time for small businesses at the moment and I think it is important to support small businesses wherever possible.

Today is the turn of


I love all things sparkly, in fact if you checked closely you may find I am part magpie. (Or possibly Dory from Finding Nemo, ooooooh shiny)

Want to see some sparkly things?

Of course you do

 I'm loving this necklace, it could make a fantastic Valentines day gift for a loved one.
£15.00 and comes in various colours

Magic mushroom earrings? Superb. £9.00 and various colours available

 Such a cute brooch and only £10.00

 Personalised phone case? Some bling with your ring perhaps. £35.00

More hearts, awwwwwwwwwwww. This personalised letter case is £35.00

 I am loving this T-shirt, the cut, the style and understated sparkles. £35.00

If I had legs like this gorgeous model I would dress like this constantly. I love this T with the upside down cross and I know so many people it would suit.  £35.00

So what do you think of Diamonds & Daggers?

What is your favourite piece from their website?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Saturday, 14 January 2012

The misery hat

Whether it is my diet, the fact that I am a hormonal wreck or all the crappy stuff going on in my life at the moment, currently I am suffering a huge case of ..............

"The Miseries"

You all know the miseries right? Have you been formally introduced to them? It is a time in your life when you just give in to all bleurgh and meh and just ride the wave of feeling sorry for yourself for a couple of days before dragging your sorry arse up out of it and giving yourself a swift slap for being such a drama queen.

Yes, THOSE miseries.

Well welcome to mine. Now usually I drown my miseries in chocolate, cakes and all sorts of stuff that is bad for you and yet tastes so so good. but unfortunately that isn't an option at the moment and for some reason sobbing into a bag of pumpkin seeds just isn't really having the same effect (funny that huh?)

But I have noticed something today that before had passed me by and now I have a little chicken & egg situation going on.

I have a hat. A green knitted hat, it has a bobble on the end of it, it is quite a long hat and it is old and fluffy and I think that maybe it smells. (yeah it does)

and whenever I feel sad I wear the hat.

BUT, do I wear the hat because I am sad, or do I feel I sad because I wear the hat?

Does the hat just reinforce my sadness? Or help me to get over it.

What do you think?

Do you have something you cling to when you are suffering a case of the miseries? Do you find that it helps?

Or should I just burn the hat?

(I should burn the hat shouldn't I?)

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x x

Friday, 13 January 2012

Nom or Vom part 2

So although most of my audience are female I do have quite a few fantastic followers of the male persuasion and some female followers who would prefer if occasionally I did a Nom or Vom they could participate in.

So just for you guys because I loves ya.

It is Nom or Vom part 2.

What do we think Gentlemen and Ladies,

Mila Kunis

Nom or Vom?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Nom or Vom

In keeping with my new healthy lifestyle programme, for inspiration I decided to watch a programme that has just started on Sky One called Obese: A Year To Change My Life.

Thank you Sky One,

You have brought into my life the most gorgeous fitness trainer Jessie Pavelka.

And when a hot fit man pings my Nom radar I feel it is my DUTY to bring him to your attention. (See what I do for you? This constant research is exhausting, exhausting I tell you)

Ladies and Gentlemen, for todays Nom or Vom I bring you

Jessie Pavelka

Phew, Is it hot in here or is it this guy?

This guy could save my life any day of the week.

He is a fine specimen of a man isn't he?

Part of me thinks it would be worthwhile getting really obese so this guy could work me out for a year. (loses self for a bit)

Oh hang on, he has a mean face.................. I LIKE it. (shivers)

So what do you think?

Wouldn't  you like a hot, sweaty session with this guy?
(Or would you like to do some exercise with him? )

Is he a Nom or Vom?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Thursday, 12 January 2012

So you want to date a blogger?

Everywhere I turned yesterday I saw people talking about a fab post doing the rounds about dating someone in PR, I first read about it here on http://hannahsnote.com/ if you want to take a look.

Well PRs you thought YOU were high-maintenance?
(erm, you did realise you are high-maintenence right?)

Meet the bloggers.

So you want to date a blogger?

Let me fill you in on a few facts before you dive in.

We are social media butterflies.

Bloggers are hugely social beings, if you so much as wink at a blogger they can put the word out and find out everything about you, and yes I do mean EVERYTHING. Before you know it they will have the name of your first pet, have added your mates on the Book of Face and courtesy of Google Maps they know where you live and probably have tweeted your ex for a bedroom reference. (By DM of course, we aren't animals) Social Media is what bloggers do. and we do it very, very well.

We love to share.

Bloggers keep hardly anything sacred. Names may be changed to protect the guilty but anything you say to a blogger is fair game for a blog post. Heaven help you if you have an argument. Before you know it, the full facts as they see them will have been posted on their blog for everyone to comment upon.

Did you have a bedroom "malfunction"?

That is a blog post just waiting to happen

Called your blogger by the wrong name?

New blog post online (bastard)

Anything you say can & will be used in evidence against you in a court of Blog.

And if you are dating a beauty blogger, there will be one point in your relationship when your skin will no longer belong to you. You might as well chuck yourself in a cage and call yourself Fluffy, you will be a guinea pig pure and simple. Creams, lotions and potions will all be slathered upon your skin in the name of research for the blog. You might as well just sit back and enjoy the new softness of your skin.

Peoples opinions matter

Erm, just not always yours. If a blogger needs an opinion, we will write a blog post about it. ( Are you starting to see a pattern forming here?) We also follow lots of other bloggers with specialised skills, we can ask THEIR opinion. There is a plus side to this though, you will never hear those words "Does this skirt make my bum look fat?" That is what Twitter is for, one Twitpic and those all important opinions will come flooding in in seconds. Never again will you panic and accidently reply "No, your fat arse makes your fat arse look fat" (That one IS going to end up in a blog post, you know that right?)

We are passionate

About our blogs, (what did you think I mean? This isn't Match.com you know) We put in blood, sweat and tears to make it work, we are constantly thinking about our next post, how to improve our photography skills, our writing style. You see that little notebook we carry around like it is a signed picture of Harry Styles penis? It isn't our diary, it is our little scribble book of ideas, If we misplace that, our world collapses. (although if you find it, then you will see just how passionate we can be)

We know whats hot or not

Dahhhhhhhling we MAKE it hot or not ;-D
Bloggers have their fingers on the pulse so hard that we know if something is dead before IT even does. And yes that does include your relationship.

Just hope and pray that one day, we don't break up with you by blog post.

Still want to date a blogger?

Are you happy to be known as the bloggers latest follower?

Let me know.

Big Fashionista x x

Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Peppa the naughty pig

Now many, many a time (especially at the moment) I have dreamt of giving that naughty little minx Peppa Pig a big cuddle.

A big warm cuddle between two slices of bread with a side hug of ketchup.

I am not a big fan of the pig they call Peppa, George or any of her family and friends. In fact they make my teeth itch. But this is purely because I have Peppa Pig overload.

In my house there is a Peppa Pig lunchbox, She takes up most of my Sky Plus planner with her sneaky little 5 minute episodes, there are welly boots, a coat, books, pencils, you name it, it probably has Peppa Pig stitched, stamped or painted on it. If it hasn't, then my child has probably stuck a Peppa sticker on it (remind me to get that off the cat soon)


At no point in my pyschopathic hatred of Peppa have I ever thought that she was a bad influence on my children because she is naughty!!

A pain in my arse? Maybe. But naughty?

You know this is a cartoon right?

If we are going to pick a TV programme as a bad influence I am damn sure that between us we can come up with something a lot worse than Peppa Pig.

I was brought up on Tom & Jerry, and it never did me any harm (Hits Mr F round the head with a frying pan)

That damn cat and mouse were evil to each other, but you don't see me stealing car radios or chilling out in a crack den at the weekends.

Course you don't.

So, I hear you ask, what has this Peppa Pig done to cause such uproar? Why are people thinking of teaching her a lesson by hanging her up in a dry cupboard seasoned in salt!!!

Well apparently there are children out there that have taken to jumping up and down in muddy puddles!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Small ones have been telling their parents NO

And, AND they have been saying YUK to vegetables.


Who would have thought that of small children?

It MUST be Peppa Pigs fault. Let us teach her a lesson by slicing her thinly and cooking her. (On the grill of course, I am dieting)

Parents, a newsflash for you. Children say no, and they don't like vegetables, That is why we the parents are the ones who have to do the PARENTING, We don't leave it up to a cartoon pig to teach our children what is right and wrong.

Your child says no, we say yes, Your child refuses to eat their vegetables and demands chocolate cake instead, then WE say no (and find cunning ways to hide their vegetables in their food)

Your child chooses to jump up and down in muddy puddles.

YOU JOIN THEM, hold their hands, laugh and stamp with them.

What kind of parent thinks that jumping up and down in muddy puddles is a bad thing anyway?

A parent that moans about a child jumping up and down in a muddy puddle?

THAT is the bad influence in a childs life.

Not Peppa Pig (although, can we eat her anyway-please?)

What do you think?

Is Peppa a bad influence on your children, or do people need to lighten up a bit?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

The first weigh in

So there I am, standing in front of the scales at Boots, removing every single bit of spare clothing that I can think of, (Won't go naked in Boots again, I learnt that lesson) and I am praying to the god of weight loss, (Ricki Lake) that I have had a good week.

There is nothing like it being THAT time of the month, coupled with the first week of a diet to bring out the crazy in me.

I would like to apologise to Mr F, The children, the postman, and all the newsreaders on television I have shouted at and sobbed at (Usually in quick succession) over the last week. I have been a hell bitch on wheels to live with.

But, has it been worth it?

6lb off in my first week.

I can live with that. (especially with the added bonus of a period thrown in just for shit and giggles)

I am hoping that now I am over the first week I will find it a lot easier, the meals haven't been a problem, I enjoy cooking them and being inventive but my body keeps saying "nice meal, where's the cake?" or "Give me chocolate cowface or I will cut ya"

I'm hoping that that voice shuts the hell up this week.

So onwards and downwards I hope.

I want to keep up the momentum and have some good weightlosses over the next couple of weeks. I need to sort out an exercise plan soon but one step at a time.

How did your week go if you have been dieting?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Glossybox December Review

I was going to review the Glossybox in depth and choc full of beautiful photographs but

Either Antony Worral-Thompson has had access to my box, or I've used it all. Soz.

I was going to give you pictures of the beautifully scented foaming Rituals shower gel,

But it's gone.

I should be showing you pictures of the rather gorgeous Deborah Lippmann nail varnish Razzle Dazzle that was in the box, along with a sachet of the remover Stripper to go.

But it is snuggled in so nicely with all the other Deborah Lippmann varnishes that I have bought since, I don't want to disturb it. (My bank manager curses you GlossyBox, curses you)

The Nip + Fab spot fix?

It's in one of my handbags ready to use in an emergency.

The Blinc & Go Eyeshadow and blush?

The perfect shade of green is almost gone!!!! Gone, oh the shame.

I should be able to show you the Cargo Lipgloss in all it's glory........

But that has definitely gone, I glossed my lips so many times over christmas even the mistletoe got bored of me.



The box is nice, Look.

And yes, the rather festive box has also..............................GONE.

This GlossyBox was AMAZING. I truly loved every single product. Yes all the products are well and truly gone or are well on the way to being gone, all would be repurchased and in the case of the Deborah Lippmann nail varnish, has been purchased already in many, many different colours.

Nice work GlossyBox

Can't wait for Januarys box.

Big Fashionista x x

Monday, 9 January 2012

Blog Awards Email

This is the email I want to receive one day soon.

Dear Blogger (getting off to a good start here)

This is (insert generic magazine name here, I don't really want to be sued, I have nothing)

and we are starting our very own BLOG AWARDS!!!!!!!!

As you may or not be aware, soon it is the time when we renew our advertising contracts and really we could do with a big boost in hits, (plus our Klout score is looking a bit crappy)  What we are looking for is MAXIMUM exposure (For the magazine) and in return we are offering.......................

Absolutely nothing.

What we will do is throw you a bone every now and then by possibly, maybe, letting you write for us just the once, which we will send you a link to so that you can RT the arse out of it on Twitter (Still thinking of our Klout here) But once the initial excitement has died down and we have sealed some really juicy advertising contracts then it goes without saying we will deny all knowledge of your existence and will hit delete on all your emails without even reading,

We will of COURSE give you a shiny little badge for your blog, we know how you hairy-armed bloggers love a badge. This is to direct even more traffic towards our website and subliminally imprint our name onto all your readers brains forever, we aren't animals, we will make it sparkly.

A link on our website to your blog? Um we don't actually have the capabilities to do that at the moment, but trust me, we will be getting cupcakes with your names on them!!!!!!!!!

Good luck to us, I mean you in our fabulous Blog Awards,  We love blogs, we really do. we put up with them all the time.

Yours Sincerely

Huge importantant magazine editor.

(written by intern)

Culling the gifts

So now everyone who has children is currently exhaling like a (insert your own exhaling joke here, my brain is fried from this diet) It is the first full week they go back to school and I am exhaling like an extractor fan here.

Now it is time to do the most important job you can ever do as a parent.

Christmas is over, It's time to cull the presents.

You know what I'm saying here? Parents it is time to remove the things designed to damage the kids, your house or even you.

You can tell how much your family loves or loathes you by the presents your offspring receive at christmas. Not the main presents obviously, that is too easy. I'm talking about stocking fillers here.

For example,

Felt tips,

It takes a special kind of sadist to wrap up felt tips as a christmas present for a child, You can practically see them giggling away in their sleeves as they imagine those bad boys being unwrapped by your very own budding mini Banksy who only has guerrilla graffiti on their mind. (Oh look, a new piece of of artwork has appeared on the living room wall- Awwwww, lovely. Grinds teeth) 


Yet another gift that just keeps on giving, especially if there is a whole set of weapons, I mean cutters, rollers and mashers. You know the stuff? The stuff that buries itself into your carpet like an IED, ready to rise up and be trodden in all over again. The stuff sticks like shit to a blanket and it doesn't matter how many different colours of it you buy, before you know it you have a huge ball of brown stuff that has picked up dirt, food and all kinds of other suspicious things that you don't want to look too closely at.
(That gift is one to be unwrapped, put in a cupboard and then LOST at the first opportunity)

Drum Kit

Basically whoever gave a drum kit to your child HATES you. There is no way of getting around it, They really don't like you, the only way they could be clearer about it is to come up and punch you in the face or send you a card which says "I'm not being funny but if you were on fire and I had a glass of water, I'd drink it" (I want that card by the way, do think I can buy it in Clintons?) 

Now you may be thinking, (Crap, I better change that birthday present for Kellie's kids) or even, what does this have to do with me? I don't have children. But if you know any small people, or think that you may know some small people in the future then you have to think deeply about this. Gifts are a total minefield these days,

and christmas is just an opportunity to either mess it up completely or....................... have a little fun with it.

Next time you open that gift for your two year old precious little Tazmanian Devil wannabe and you find ten pots of glitter and four tubes of superglue............

Think carefully. What did you last buy for their children.........

Oh you didn't?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Well sometimes, you reap what you sew.

So come on, what's the worst gift your child has received this christmas or any other?

Have you had to cull their presents like a group of baby seals?

Let me know.

Big Fashionista x x

Sunday, 8 January 2012

Fiat 500 and JLo? Not buying it.

Can someone text Liv and tell her to send JLo flowers, she is officially off my shit list.

Ok, so I've still not forgiven Liv Tyler completely and I'm still not completely on board with the whole Pantene thing but while I was sitting there grinding my teeth at the superficial bitches on Take Me Out, (No likey, no lighty) the adverts came on and I spat my coffee everywhere and then practiced my bitch face while JLo pranced across my screen in a Fiat!!!!!

A Fiat?

A Fiat?

Now I'm not rich but I will turn out my pockets (Ok, Mr Fashionistas pockets, I'm pretty, not dumb) and my kids money banks and give you every penny they have if you can find me one picture of JLo rolling through Beverley Hills on her day off in her Fiat 500, (I'm pretty sure my (their) money is safe)

It just ain't happening is it?

We ain't fooled by the rocks that she got, (In fact we don't give a crap)

She's still, she's still Jenny from the block, (This was her "street" phase yes?)

She used to have a little, now she gotta lot, (Of NERVE to think we are gonna swallow her as a Fiat driver that is)

She's still Jenny from the block ya know.

Anyone else see the Fiat 500 as more of a rollerskate than a car anyway, the woman has twins for gods sake, there is no way on this fine earth that rollerskate masquerading as a car is going to accommodate JLo's arse, 2 babies, a double buggy and a nanny or two.

Something (other than the husband) has to give.

(Bet it's JLo, "Oh it's ok au pair, I'll take the Escalade, you take the children, I'll meet you there"  She's real like that remember? )

There is more chance of me getting caught climbing out the back of VIN Diesel than her being caught climbing out of a Fiat 500.

It isn't even SLIGHTLY believable, I can understand why Pantene wanted Liv, she has beautiful hair, of course they want to put their name to it. But when you think Fiat, you don't immediately think Jennifer Lopez do you? In fact, even after a whole week you probably still wouldn't think Jennifer Lopez, (I wouldn't even think Jennifer Saunders to be fair)

Tom Cruise? Possibly, he's a small man. I could believe that Mr Cruise MAY want a car that would suit his........... um, stature.

But either someone has been smoking waaayyyyyyyy too much green or they put loads of names in a hat and just pulled one out.

Or maybe both? I can see a big group of execs sitting around a table getting high on their own supply, surrounded by cereal boxes and empty wotsits packets and as it gets passed to the left hand side they all had to come up with a name of a celebrity they want to represent Fiat.

They started off with Chico, moved onto Peaches Geldof and as the J's get stronger, the list got wilder.

(I'm going to assume that by the time they got to JLo they were completely monged out of their brain on some industrial strength shit and checking the fridge for leftovers)

Then when they got their people to talk to JLo's people and she said yes they probably thought that they had permanently damaged some cells!!!!

Well either that or they think WE HAVE!!!!!!

Coz i'm not buying a Fiat, and I'm not buying that JLo is either.

From what I've heard she used a body double for most of the advert anyway!!!!

And what does that say about your product if the star you've paid to star in your advert can't even be arsed (No pun intended) to actually star in it? or bear to even sit in the car.

You may like to keep it real JLo,

But so do I

Like HELL do you drive a Fiat.

Liv, come back babe, all is forgiven. By the way Liv, what car do you drive?

Big Fashionista x x

Are we believing that Jenny from the block drives a Fiat?

Or do we think she has just cashed the cheque and put it towards more rocks that we should not be fooled by?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x

Friday, 6 January 2012

Nom or Vom

New followers of this blog, welcome to Friday, the day when I bring you gratuitious pics of a hot male celeb and then we grade them like prime rump.

Shallow? Yes
Fun? Hell yes.

This week, there can be only one.........................

This guy I actually hold fully responsible for my love of men that are bad to the bone.
(shivers a little bit)
If you are watching Celebrity Big Brother and you are young enough to say Michael WHO then I need you to do some things for me.

Firstly, go rent yourself Reservoir Dogs and don't come back until you can quote me at least ten lines from this film and the WHOLE of the "worlds smallest violin playing just for the waitress" scene (Well I can do it)

Secondly, behold the fine fine specimen that is Michael Madsen

Ladies & Gentlemen

Michael Madsen (In his prime)

I would, I really, really would. In fact I'd do him some serious damage.

Nom nom nom.

What do we think everyone?

Nom or Vom?

Let me know

Big Fashionista x x
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