Thursday, 8 March 2012

Is revenge sweet?

Does revenge taste sweet?

I'm going to be honest here,

Yes. yes it does.

Let's face it. If someone messes you around, you can turn the other cheek (The grown up thing to do)

Or you can mess with their head so badly that they don't know what is up and what is down.

(Personally I will go for the childish revenge every time)

There is the obvious revenge.

Prawns in the widow poles.

Cleaning the toilet with their toothbrush. (giggles a bit. Ahhhhhh memories)

or you could get ever so slightly creative and feed them the piece of pork that you had to rescue off the cat that tried to steal it (erm, that was a "friend" honest. Don't look at me like that)

Childish? Yes

So much fun that I (They, I mean they) still giggle at the memories? Hell yes

Come on, if you knew that you could get away with it after someone had pissed you off would you not execute some sort of revenge?

or have you in the past?

I really want to know what childish acts of revenge you have pulled
(gets out pad and pen to take notes........... for my "friend" obviously)


Let me know

and as usual, feel free to take advantage of the anon button (Unless you're a troll)

and as always, this blog is captcha free.

knock your little commentating socks off


Big Fashionista x x x
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49 comments

  1. I found out an ex was sleeping around so I mixed hair removal cream into his shampoo. :)JoJo

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  2. My boyfriend was cheating on me so I dropped his new iPhone into a bowl of water and then took it out and dried it off. He never knew that I had done it and the phone never worked properly again

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  3. I set up a fake dating profile for my ex on a gay website - I had been trying to leave him for ages but needed a more substantial reason than 'I just don't like you any more' (which I would say to him a million times, but he never took the hint). I maintained it and gave out his number to numerous gay chaps - cue numerous texts and calls from men on his phone, which I 'found out' about and confronted him with. He tried to 'deny it' but I told him that was the final straw and at last, he left because I couldn't possibly date a 'closeted' gay man - he was/is still oblivious as to why so many men had his number.

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  4. I've had no need to exact revenge for a very long time but when, as a mid-teen, I split up with 'the love of my life' *rolls eyes*, I threw the video we'd rented (on his card) in the canal so he ended up with a fine. It sounds a bit pathetic in the revenge stakes now but it made me feel good at the time, that and the crying and the chocolate.

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  5. I know someone, they will remain nameless, who on the return of their very very drunk other half (who was meant to have plans with her and cancelled for mates)Poured lots of water over his trousers to make him thing he had pee'd himself and took his remaining money from pockets and treated herself the following day :)

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  6. Throughout my university years I got absoloutely sick and tired of house/flatmates stealing my milk...I budgeted so hard for it! Eventually I emptied half a tub of salt into a half full carton of milk and waited with baited breath...low and behold it was my best friend who started complaining how salty his new cereal tasted...culprit caught, and revenge taken, no one ever touched my milk again!

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  7. When my sister and her ex split up, they were still sharing the house and when she was out, she suspected that he was bringing back the women he'd cheated on her with, and drinking all of my sister's alcohol. So she decided to 'amend' the booze with liquid laxative - apparently you can't taste it much in Tia Maria!! Both the ex and the other woman that my sister suspected were strangely ill the next few days.... ;-)

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  8. Love these excellent ideas - rvenge is very under-rated !

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  9. Syrup of figs milkshake was given to my scumbag of a boyfriend.

    I also put the same stuff in gravy that I used to make a cottage pie to give to his parents!

    There is nothing I wouldn't do (this side of the law) to get revenge on someone!

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  10. During my flying career there were many times I would've loved to have exacted revenge on rude passengers but I usually took it all in my stride and remained the ultimate professional. However, I recall one flight when a passenger demonstrated throughout the 10 hour flight just how rude and obnoxious some individuals can be. He was an 'upgrade wanna be' and because he wasn't upgraded he made my life hell for that 10 hours, he almost reduced me tears. On landing in the UK I informed the ground crew that the passenger in a certain seat had been behaving in a very strange manner throughout the flight, I indicated that he had not eaten or drunk anything, had spent an unusual amount of time in the toilet, was sweating a lot and generally looked very nervous and on edge. On going through arrivals I noticed the 'said passenger' being led away to the 'examination room' by customs officials, I'm sure I could hear the snapping of marigold gloves as I walked past. On that one and only occasion revenge was very sweet indeed :) Jude x @jadlgw

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    Replies
    1. You made me spit my wasabi peas out everywhere!!!!
      LOL

      Genuinely in awe

      And a little bit frightened

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    2. The moral of this story is 'don't ever piss off your cabin crew' I have some right old stories about cabin crew revenge that I may reveal in my old age to my grand children lol xx

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  11. Ahhh sweet revenge, I do like getting my own back :)

    Superglue in the hair gel of one ex, refilling the toothpaste tube of another with pva glue (non toxic, dontcha know). Fun times!

    Making a dinner of a beef casserole and adding a hefty dose of laxative was a good one as well, he never ate beef casserole again though :)

    In reply to Jude, my sister was a flight attendant for years and often did similar to what you did. Like she said, if they want to arrogant and obnoxious let's see how they react to a full body search.

    xo

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    Replies
    1. Raven, I have plenty of stories from my flying days that would make your hair curl, I'm sure your sister has told you many of her hysterical tales, they were the best days of my life :)

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    2. She tells me often, in fact it makes me rather scared of ever flying again!

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  12. When I used to get the train to work there was this really creepy guy who used to sit near me no matter where I sat to avoid him, one trip was packed solid and I was standing, he stood next to me and put his hand on my bum, I was so incensed that I grabbed his hand, raised it in the air and announced to the packed compartment 'has anyone lost a hand? I just found one on my arse' After that he started getting on the train at the opposite end of the train to me!

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    Replies
    1. You are amazing! I'm nicking that for future beingg-felt-up-in-cramped-quarters occasions!

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    2. Oops, 2 g's! I was so excited by your awesome comeback :)

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    3. I still can't believe I was brave enough, not usually type but I was so mad!

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  13. I've never really been that evil, I'm taking notes though :)

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  14. Very geeky revenge - Some jumped up oik of a first year in my computer science course (I was a third year) was doing some very nasty and offensive trolling of the open forums, boasting how much smarter he was than all the staff & other students. straight after one of his posts, two friends and I went down to his lab and i logged on a machine a few rows behind him. I got remote root access on his lab computer, and started.... fiddling with his session. I crammed /tmp with junk, so he started running out of free memory. I started killing his browser at irregular intervals. the coup de grace was popping open his cd tray and sending a popup to his screen saying "you're not as cool as you think". I set his machine to reboot and logged off, expunging the login log as I went. nobody was any the wiser. the gulp was audible, the loss of hubris, palpable. :)

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  15. Oh I'm so hitting anonymous.

    My partner (still now) and I were going through a bad patch, and safe to say we couldn't stand each other. You know what its like.

    Anyway, the skank who lived upstairs from him and my other half one evening got a bit pissed and slept together. That I could've dealt with.

    What I couldn't stomach was that he caught crabs from her. Nice, right?
    So, off he goes to the GP for cream to kill the buggers. Which we then both had to use. Except he went first and asked me to read the bottle. It said in massive scary letters with skulls and cross bones, the lot, do not put this on your face. So, on him asking me do I rub it on my face, I took my chances and said, yes, obviously you have hair on your face so yeah you went down below so rub it in.

    Its safe to say I have never heard a man scream so loud and in so much pain in my life. The neighbours two doors down heard him.

    But he has never, ever dared cheat again.

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    Replies
    1. You are my new hero! xo

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    2. Cheers. It was before video phones or I'd have filmed it as well.

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  16. A now ex-boyfriend cheated (for the 2nd time) so I did the following:
    1) When he sent me a huge bunch of lilies to apologise I trampled all over them and I then couriered them back from my work to his WORK all crushed (still in plastic wrapping) with a huge piece of white paper on the front with his name in huge writing: TO THE LYING, CHEATING BASTARD JOHN SMITH*, then the address etc
    *not his real name
    2) I rang a good girlfriend of mine in Australia, from his landline, and told her to keep the call going overnight. His bill was for 12 hours from UK to Australia!!
    3) I wrote a letter to his landlord, he was renting a luxury London flat at the time, saying he was a drug dealer...he was kicked out as a result

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  17. An ex friend of mine started a hate campaign against me for no apparent reason.

    I had his photo bucket (online photo storage) and came across a picture of his dick and torso (you could tell it was him, and his room).

    I then uploaded it online to various cock sharing websites with the caption "Hi I'm [his name] I go to [academic institution]" and lots of personal information inciting him.

    I then waited a few weeks till google had cached it, and make sure it came up when you google the academic institution. Did my research, created a fake email account, and wrote an email as a dismayed and disgusted parent because I'd googled the college, and came across it.

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    Replies
    1. Needless to say his was nearly expelled, in the end got suspended. His parents were called into college, and even his Mother saw the photo of his cock. He ran out crying. I don't feel bad, it certainly taught him a lesson ha...

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  18. I helped a friend in their revenge effort. Her boyfriend was a lying, cheating scumbag (in a small town where everyone knows each other, idiot, he soon got caught).

    We did the classic-for-a-reason 'fake phone call from the clap clinic'. Told him he'd been named as a 'sexual contact' of someone with clamydia, and would need to attend the clinic, provide a full list of partners and give a swab and blood sample.

    I even managed to persuade him the blood sample would need to be taken from his old chap. Told you he was an idiot.

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  19. A man once made the mistake of raising his hand to me, so seeing as he was a keen clubber I gave his picture to all the door staff in town and told them he was a known pedophile.
    Everytime he went out he got his arse kicked. Shame.

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  20. Going anon for this one.

    When I was young and experimental I had a 6 month thing with another girl. She turned out to be the biggest ho-bag I've ever met - she was far more unfaithful than any guy I've ever known. She was supposed to be a lesbian but shagged everything that twitched - that was just her. Eventually we split up, which was fine, but we worked at the same place and she started causing me a LOT of grief at work. We all worked in small crews and she'd turned her crew against me, so it was a really bad time.

    One night when I was drunk my new boyfriend, his best mate and I went to town on her pride and joy - her car. We smashed both windscreens, smashed all the lights and dented the body work. I kept a windscreen wiper as a souvenir for about 6 months. Every time she pissed me off I just thought about that windscreen wiper and it got me through.

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    1. Do you come with hazard warning lights?

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  21. About 10 years ago I started hanging out with some girls who did dominatrix work. I ended up being asked to take on a client, and like a naive twat, I took a cheque from the guy. Of COURSE it bounced, and I hatched my revenge. I arranged to see him again, and he thought he was going to get another free session with the stupid girl.

    When he came round he had a bottle of wine and a bunch of flowers. I made him strip naked and put on a ladies thong which was a couple of sizes too small for him. Enjoy that imagery. I'd laid out a load of grit in the cupboard under the stairs in the basement and made him kneel in it. I shut him in there in the dark and cold (it was November) and went upstairs to drink the wine he'd bought. I got good and sloshed over the next couple of hours -I think I drank another bottle, too - and when I needed a piss I went downstairs and got his car keys out of his trouser pocket. I tip toed outside and pissed all over the leather seats of his Audi. My housemate came down at this point and I was laughing so hard I couldn't even pee any more. She came in and took a piss, too. I came back in and eventually let him out of the cupboard. He asked if I'd been in his car and slowly shook my head no, feigning innocence.

    About a week later he rang me to tell me it was his sister's car (I'd wondered why it was full of toys) and he'd had to have it professionally cleaned to get rid of the smell. Oh, how I laughed!

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  22. Revenge works for me, because I'm a Taurus and it's my given astrological right. If that's not a good enough excuse, I'm sure bull in a china store works.

    And for those that follow Chinese astrology, I was born in the year of the Fire Horse (not 1906). Which means I apparently have the following traits: dangerous, headstrong, and deadly to men. However, I discriminate when it comes to revenge..

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  23. An ex of mine cheated on me and I fixed him his favourite chocolate fudge cake with chocolate fudge frosting, which contained a combination of two key ingredients, Ex-Lax and his dog's poo. He heartily devoured most of the cake and later that night, he seized up with the worst cramping diarrhea. Taught that mangy dog a lesson! Mwhahahaha!!

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  24. Similar to one confession above, but I was convinced my boyfriend was sleeping with other girls behind my back, and when I'd had enough, and was gonna dump him, I took my revenge. He had a phobia of anything medical/doctor-related, and would barely touch western medicine. Convinced I was right about him cheating, I told him I'd had some 'symptoms' and got checked out at a clinic - and tested positive for gonhorrea and chlamydia - and was furious, saying he must have cheated, etc - I was not the cheating type at all, so I knew he would never accuse me - so I made sure he went to the clinic - his worst nightmare. He never admitted to cheating, but he didn't deny it or accuse me either, so I am guessing he must have been doing something to actually go to the clinic - I even went along with him. It was sweet! Before the results came back, I broke up with him, then posted a very obvious note (no envelope) through his door (he lived with his younger brother and a mate) saying - "B, The GUM Clinic called me - you must have given them a fake number - your results are back and your medication is ready to collect - please call them on...." I cannot tell you how pleased I was and I have no ounce of guilt! To be honest, I am more of a practical joker, and prefer these kind of stunts for fun (I know lots of office-related pranks!), but it means so much more when its revenge! Thanks for letting me share Kellie!

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  25. When my ex cheated on me I told a group of her friends they both had an STD 6 months later I found out he went for a test and it was the "worst experience of his life" diddums

    Helloterrilowe.blogspot.com

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  26. This is why I am no cheat. You ladies are terrifying.

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  27. I once had a neighbor who decided, for no apparent reason, that he didn't like me. He harassed me every chance he had in an attempt to make me miserable. But then I noticed he wasn't spending like he used to. He wasn't throwing big parties at his house. He got rid of his recreational vehicle. The only time he bought anything new was when he got some noisy lawn equipment he would start whenever I went outside. Assuming he was financially strained, I decided to use his weakness against him. I did everything I could to make his life more expensive: a little more lawn maintenance needed here, having to get something to block the view of the my new garden angel there, needing something even bigger to irritate me since I didn't seem to notice the last thing. It only took a few months before collectors started knocking. He spent himself into foreclosure and bankruptcy, and my neighborhood has become peaceful again.

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  28. This isn't as evil as the rest of you ladies, but a few years ago, I met a guy at work who asked me out. We went on a few lunch dates and then decided to do something on evening...that is until he cancelled on me. My radar was on high alert and I noticed him asking shifty when his phone kept ringing on the way home after work one day, and he cancelled the calls. Then he vanished from work mysteriously (it later transpired he'd been dismissed for doing something terrible).

    He didn't answer his phone, reply to texts, nada. So bizarre! That is until he resurfaced some weeks later and gave no explanation for his disappearing act. He upped his game and started flirting outrageously and round about the same time, I managed to track him down on good old Facebook and discovered he was in a long term relationship. So THAT'S why he bailed out on me and was acting odd when his phone kept ringing, the bastard! And he was classy enough to grab my arse on a street and kiss me (badly).

    He wasn't the brightest bulb so when I confronted him about it, the first thing he said was, "How do you know?" Yes, really. Well, I figured I could have some fun here so I decided to play along and he would text me while he was unemployed, begging me to visit his flat, wearing PVC knee high boots and not much else but only during the day time because his girlfriend was at work! Out of boredom (and fed up of the constant sexual harrassment), I challenged him and he obliged by sending me a picture message of his mushroom-like little fella and a topless shot with his face in the frame too. Thankfully he didn't expect me to send him outrageous pictures in return. Then I agreed to come over to his place and told him to get ready. I switched my phone off, went for a swim and when I turned my phone back on in the evening, I had a distressed message from him asking where I was. I innocently told him I had fallen asleep following a migraine. He believed me and then I deleted the little shit from my phone. I really wanted to send his picture to his girlfriend and ask if she recognised it, but sadly I didn't have her email address, and I wasn't going to contact her through Facebook or she'd know who I was!

    I've since discovered he's still with that poor girl and is now a father. Some people should be sterilised...

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  29. So.... I was seeing this guy at uni who I just adored. He was older than me and I just thought he was the most amazing creature I'd ever seen.

    I dropped out of uni at the Christmas of my first year but we stayed together. Anyway, I took a trip to see him for Valentines Day but when I got there I found out that he was working because he "forgot" to take the time off.

    So there I was, lonely and miserable on the most romantic night of the year while he was off at work.

    I spent the whole night at his halls of residence, drinking with our mates waiting for him to come home.

    The problems began when he rocked back at midnight and started to accuse me of sleeping with his mates while he'd been out !

    I was so hurt and upset that I left the next morning and told him I never wanted to see him again.

    A few weeks later, I found out through mutual friends that he'd been sleeping with some other chick behind my back and, to add salt to the wound, GOT HER PREGNANT!!

    Was this shit for real!? I couldn't believe.... I was heartbroken but deep down I knew there must have been a reason behind why he spoke to me like shit.

    I'd been living with my Nan when I found out what he'd been up to and was sorting through my stuff to see what I had of his that I could chuck when I happened across a pair of his black boxer shorts.

    I was still in contact some of the girls from my halls and I remembered one of them had said that he'd been away on a boys weekend so I did some digging, found out where he was now living (with her, I might add) and posted the pants back to him, with a tiny bit of toothpaste smeared down the inside and a little note that read "you left these......"

    Childish? Yes.

    Do I regret it? No.

    To this day, it makes my heart happy to know she threw his ass out.

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  30. I used to work for a really nasty bloke, really spiteful and horrible. A couple of years after my dad had died he thought it would be funny to say what a cheap fathers day I would have as I wouldn't have to buy a card! So Fir the next 2 years that I worked for him every cup of coffee I made him had either spit, bogie, dirt, or anything on the same level of grossness that I could think of, made me chuckle every time I watched him drink it :-)

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