Tuesday, 9 July 2013

Reasons why I am better than Taylor Swift



Yesterday I heard that Taylor Swift and Matthew Gray Gubler (Spencer from Criminal Minds) may be   having a meeting of private parts, bumping uglies, doing the nasty, dating, if you will.

Now this upsets me. In fact I take back every bad thing I ever said about the One Direction fans who were not exactly complimentary about Taylor dating their beloved Harry. Girls, and guys, I GET IT NOW. 

So while Matthew may not yet be mine, what I thought I could do was get out onto the internet, (just in case he isn't an avid Big Fashionista reader) some reasons why I am better than Taylor Swift.



Firstly, I am not Taylor Swift. Now I could have kept that for my finale, but I just needed to get that out there. I think it is a pretty good reason why I am better than her, I'm not her.


I have never murdered Pour Some Sugar On Me, by Def Leppard. In fact she murdered it, buried it, dug it up and then murdered it all over again. I have too much respect for that song to do it a disservice by actually singing it. I may mouth the words at *ahem* special occasions, but singing it out loud. Hell no.


If Kanye came up on stage while I was accepting an award and said that Beyonce deserved it more? I'd have to step to one side and agree.


I haven't been shagged by Harry Styles. (I don't think there are a lot of us around) 


I do not write songs about every break up I ever have. I don't even write blog posts about them. I let that crap go.


Another reason I am better than Taylor Swift is, I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 37 bitch, and I don't go around creating ear worms that also make people who are older than 22 feel like crap because every time we sing it, small children laugh at us.


and lastly.............

Well look. (inserts tongue in cheek) 






So this is why I am better than Taylor Swift. and why Matthew Gray Grubler would be better off with me rather than her.

She needs to keep her dirty paws off of him.


What do you think?



Why are YOU better than Taylor Swift, let me know.

(And no using my comments to plead your case why Matthew will better off with you, if I can fight off Taylor, I will do the same to you. You know it)



Big Fashionista x x x



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13 comments

  1. I dont think any girls have shagged Harry Styles just Louis Tomlinson haha
    he sets my gaydar of sooo much and Of course youre better than Taylor Swift she has no self value she dates anything that moves shes an immature child and she writes songs about her ex's has she ever stopped to think maybe shes the fucking problem? haha

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  2. NO. How dare they. MGG is a nerd and she is, well, a young woman with an itch in her panties and a compass that points to 'BED'. Hands off the Gubler, Taylor. Oh hold on, Shemar Moore is single right? All is right in the world again. I'll be his baby gurl.

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  3. Ahhh im with you. I wanna scream at her .... Keep ur tentacles off him biotch....

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  4. I really don't understand why people criticise Taylor for writing about her ex's - musicians have been doing that since the beginning of time! It's what makes songs so relatable. Not to mention that Taylor is a country music star, a genre which is well know for warbling about heartbreak. Would you rather she bought her songs instead of writing them? Then what would make her any different to every other pop star out there?

    Not a fan I just don't understand this 'issue'.

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  5. As long as she doesn't set foot within a 10-mile radius of Bradley Cooper, I'm happy for her to carry on with her serial dating.

    However, I am more than happy to "accidentally" tell Gubler some stories about her and casually mention how awesome you are. It's just a service I provide.

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  6. This is a really funny post, loved it! I agree with you though, I've never been the biggest fan of Taylor Swift even though many people my age seem to love her.

    -Rhi x

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  7. Great post! I am better than Taylor Swift because I have better legs than her and I'm 27 years old and a man! So there!

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  8. Bloody ear worms!!! Since reading the title of this post and all the way through to here I've got her looping in my ear... Send help!!
    Lol actually don't mind her songs but as a self confessed teeny bopper who never grew out of it and can't find a support group I'm a lost cause. Seriously though she can't have MGG ;)

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  9. Ooh I didn't know she did that to Def Leppard. I still haven't forgiven her for Jake Gyllenhaal, and I'll never forgive him. NEVER.

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    Replies
    1. http://youtu.be/Yo5WQjPwumw may have to copy and paste but there you go.

      Delete
  10. LAUGH OUT LOUD. Genuinely want this to become a meme like shit fashion girls say - "why I'm better than swift". YES.

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  11. I am OUTRAGED by this news!! :(
    p.s. you are clearly better than Miss Swift.

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  12. Haha oh my god you are hilarious. And completely right!!

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