Tuesday, 15 October 2013

5 Things Successful people do before 8am, and what I actually do.



Yesterday I read a rather interesting article on the Forbes website.

Now I know what you are thinking, (Probably, "Who did you get to read out the big words for you, Kellie") and the answer is, it was a retweet, I was bored, I went to see what it was about and got sucked in. It's like Buzzfeed for clever people, innit?

The article that I was reading was titled,

5 Things Super Successful People Do Before 8am.

So I read it, and realised why i am probably not all that successful.

The five things were,

Exercise.

Does kicking my duvet and screaming into my pillow, "Why does the morning come round so damn fast" count? Because if it does, I am all over that.

Map Out Your Day. 

Um, ok, so I am probably not that good at this part, I have already explained that organisation is not my strong point. I'm more like the first version of Apple Maps, It starts off well but suddenly there is a fucking zoo where you least expected it.

Eat A Healthy Breakfast.

WHOSE idea of healthy? Because I get the feeling that Forbes and I are going to have differing opinions on what makes a healthy breakfast.

If at least one of the Forbes lot doesn't go to work on Menthol cigarettes and the souls of the innocents then I will eat my woolly hat.

And can someone grab me a coffee while they are at it?


Visualization.

Until someone gets me that first coffee in the morning, there is absolutely NO visualisation, I cannot even visualise where the front door is, let alone enter the window of my mind (why can't I use the door? Surely that is much more polite?)


Make Your Day Top Heavy. 

I have an excellent rack? Does that count? Is my aim to make everyone forget how unsuccessful I am by wearing a tight top? Because I can do that, I can. (I really can't)
When Forbes say, Make your day top-heavy, I don't think they are referring to the size of my Lady Lumps, instead they mean do the undesirable jobs on your list first, get them out of the way.

Well I DID, I got out of bed, Jesus these Forbes lot don't ask for much, do they?

And if you are successful, you have done all of this by 8am?

Amateurs.

I have to get children ready to leave the house before 8am to get to school, I have to get them to exercise.... their right to a free education, that at 7am they REALLY don't want. I have to map out their day, which usually means finding their school planners, because obviously they are not where they last left them, are they? Eating a healthy breakfast usually involves a cereal bar, so sue me. It is either that or I chase them around the house with a spoon which is the teenage equivalent of trying to give a cat a worming tablet, although if I could hide a bowl of  cereal in a packet of crisps I would be ok. I also have to visualise where my little cherubs left their school bags, again, not where they thought they left them, and their shoes too. How the hell do children manage to lose just the ONE school shoe? And then making the day top-heavy is when they explain to me at 7.45 that they have no clean shirts and why have I not washed them?


aaarrrggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

So Forbes, Let us talk about what successful people do before 8am because quite frankly, your examples seem to me to be doing it wrong, I not only (Sort of) do all that for me, I also do it for a couple of other people as well.

How do you like that?


And why the HELL am I not successful yet?

So what else do YOU do before 8am that wipes the floor with what "successful people" do before 8am.


Let me know.


Big Fashionista x x x


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7 comments

  1. Um I have worked for 12 hours before 8am. does that count?
    If I haven't been at work, 8 am.doesn't exist. Oh,except for this coming Thursday cos I'm having my new tattoo done :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. You're lucky if I even get out of bed before 8am, so you're a hero in my eyes.

    ReplyDelete
  3. These lists describe people who only exist in some sort of corporate Narnia. Utter bollocks.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm up at 5.30am to make DH a cup of tea, then shower at 6am, and wake DD, I make the beds, she gets dressed then she does some homework, organises her school stuff and we have breakfast all together. Then it's 7.30 am and I'm off to work, she gets the train. Can I get a badge?

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm up at 5.30am to make DH a cup of tea, then shower at 6am, and wake DD, I make the beds, she gets dressed then she does some homework, organises her school stuff and we have breakfast all together. Then it's 7.30 am and I'm off to work, she gets the train. Can I get a badge?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Bed at 1am, up circa 3am to feed baby and wake husband to feed other baby. Boil kettle. Warm bottles. Change nappies. Back to bed around 4. Up again around 5.30-6. Boil kettle. Warm bottles. Feed babies. Change nappies. Turn on sterilizer. Back to bed before 7. Up at 8. Wake eldest for school. Fight over teeth, cleaning fingernails and breakfast, then try and feed before babies wake. Make lunch. Attempt to make coffee. Leave coffee to warm bottles, feed babies, change nappies...

    ReplyDelete
  7. baha! great article. although I am not a mother, I quite enjoyed your response.

    www.styleinterplay.com

    .....

    ReplyDelete

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