Wednesday, 5 March 2014
Taking the Service OUT of Self-Service
Self service tills,
Never has the word service been less needed,
And let’s be honest here, the word ‘self’ is pretty much superfluous as well, I am yet to complete a transaction with one of the self-service machines you now find in supermarkets, pretty much everywhere without needing to “CALL FOR ASSISTANCE”
I end up talking to the self service machine as if it is a real person as well. (One that I’m not going to end up taking out for Tequila slammers and a dance-off either)
“Unexpected item in the baggage area”
“Unexpected item in the baggage area? Sweetheart, I just scanned a salad (Ok, a cake) and now there is a salad (let me have this) in the baggage area, this does not count as an unexpected item in the baggage area. A Tiger? Now that would be unexpected, but when I scan something through and then something turns up in the baggage area, weighing pretty much the same as a choux bun, (It’s a light salad, leave me be) how on earth that can be unexpected is beyond me.
“Ok, I have picked up the bloody salad, now please can i carry on packing? What do you mean Call for assistance? I’m done here, it is a bloody salad”
“Call for assistance? Can you not handle this by yourself? Who did your programming? they should be ashamed of themselves”
“Am I 21? Oh you flatterer, what do you mean Call for Assistance? Bastard”
“Run out of paper? “Want me to press the Call for Assistance button?”
I think I’m on first name terms with some of the Assistance staff these days and while I understand the need for some self-serve tills, honestly? it just makes me sad that so many of them exist these days.
Self-serve tills can’t “slow it down a bit” when you are trying to fit a baguette in a carrier bag full of SALAD, (HA) or ask you your plans for the day. I miss the small talk with check-out staff and I would rather queue that little bit longer to be served by someone with a brain who doesn’t need to CALL FOR ASSISTANCE every third item.
Self Service Tills drive me round the bend.
How about you?
Do you love the freedom that a self-serve till can bring you?
Or do you HATE them so much that the veins in your EYEBALLS begin to throb whenever you think about them?
Let me know,
Big Fashionista x x x
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