Thursday, 24 April 2014

Avril Lavigne, Hello Kitty, Review





Now, count yourself lucky, I caught the actual video for this when it hit Youtube for all of one day before being yanked harder and faster than a Paddy Power advert. I've given you the one with lyrics above so you can really capture the complexity and dep....... (Jokes, it's about as deep as a David Cameron promise) 



If you have watched and listened to the Avril Lavigne "song" (I use that term, verrrrrrrrry loosely) then wipe the blood from your ears and eyes and listen up.

What the HELL was that?

Seriously, someone help me out here, that tune (again, very loose) will now haunt me until the day I die. What on earth possessed Ms Lavigne, now Mrs Kroeger that she should do this? Let us just for one second sweep aside all the stereotyping, (actually, lets not. What is with all the stereotyping, Avril) and concentrate on the banality and absolute ridiculousness of the song.

It is awful, just awful. My immediate thoughts (Where are the sharp implements to pierce my eardrums and eyeballs?) were that this was an old tune that had risen from the grave where it should have stayed dead and buried, I WAS WRONG!!!!!

My second thoughts were, (That must be a seriously old painting that Avril Lavigne has in her attic growing old while she stays forever young) Did she lose a bet?

My third thought was, I hope Chad Kroeger divorces her for this, only to then discover he co-wrote it.

FOR SHAME, MR KROEGER, FOR SHAME.


If you are on a mobile site you may not be able to view the Avril Lavigne video posted above, so if you are not on a mobile site, it sucks to be you and I am sorry you have had to listen to it to make up your own mind.

Have you heard the Avril Lavigne song? (loosely)  I'd love to hear your thoughts on it.

Let me know.


Big Fashionista x x x


PS, Gwen Stefani called, she wants her song and look back.

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11 comments

  1. I lasted 42 seconds before I had to stop it! That is so bad!!

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  2. I can't stand her. CAN NOT STAND. I got as far as "fat kid on a pack of Smarties" and hit stop. "Mom's not home" - sorry, honey - you're TWENTY FUCKING NINE. She could have done something really good with her talent - her first album was unbelievably good for her age. She has a killer voice and great songwriting ability - "I will be" by Leona Lewis - that's an Avril song. She wrote "Breakaway" by Kelly Clarkson, a fantastic pop song. Then she comes along with her Skrillex hairdo and stupid fucking faux bad-girl teen-rebel attitude when she's going to be 30 in September and on her second marriage and releases a stupid fucking song like that? Grow up. SHE INFURIATES ME. INFURIATES.

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  3. The scary thought I have is that, at some point, my daughter (lover of all shit music in the world, apart from Blondie) is going to have that blaring on her stereo. I give you the evidence that she played Katy Perry Dark Horse on repeat for an hour and a half the other night until I wanted to cause myself bodily harm and removed her iPod Dock from her bedroom. She also loves One fucking Direction (if only they were One Direction over a cliff with a dodgy SatNav).

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  4. Well that's interesting. I didn't realise that the word 'chuck' had made it across the pond - I thought it was just a northern thing.

    Also, I read the other day that Rihanna's new track 'Diamonds' was written in about 14 minutes. I think young Avril was looking to break that record with this offering.

    Anyway, I think Weird Al should come along and do a parody of this, it will surely be an improvement - after all, his version of 'A Complicated Song' was just stellar (but I guess that was a good song to start with, so maybe there's no hope at all).

    So, in summary: This song contains one surprisingly trans-atlantic lyric.

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  5. This makes Rebecca Black's Friday look like a master piece

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    Replies
    1. Damn, I had the exact same thought!

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  6. Consider my ears assaulted. Fucking awful.
    I was going to say more but I think it's all pretty much summed up by MissGreenEyes above.

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  7. I watched this video 4 hours ago. The chorus still hasn't left my brain :( Help meee! Please?!
    Hana Xx
    lostgirlhana.blogspot.com

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  8. I would sooner have a metric tonne of leeches applied to my punani than ever listen to that bollocks again. She should be banned from Canada, and everywhere else where people have ears. And OH LOOK another stupid bint appropriating WoC. Fuck off, you're not a teenager any more, so stop acting like you're excited to find your first pube! Go make lurve to Chad Kroeger's chin bush, or juggle with something like a chef's set of knives, but please, for the love of all that is good and holy in the world, STOP MAKING 'MUSIC'.

    I'm going to listen to Slayer now to purge that filth from my brain.

    ReplyDelete

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