Tuesday, 6 May 2014

Smear Test Waiting Room Thoughts.

Thoughts that go through your head in the waiting room before you have a smear test.

Did I have a shower this morning?

Did I have a shower last night?

Did I wipe properly after I had a wee?

Oh my god, what if I have tissue paper stuck to my foof! 

You know that story about the glittery flannel? What if I've done that? 

What if I fart in the nurses face?

Do I need a wee? 

I don't even know the nurses name! 

Will I make an inappropriate joke about tying a piece of string around one end of the speculum..... Again? 

When did I last have sex? 

Do I need a wee? 

And then when you come out.

Well that wasn't bad. 

Book your smear tests, ladies. 

Smear Tests save lives. 

Big Fashionista x x 



  1. I used to work with someone who had never had a smear test because she felt if a male doctor or nurse did it it would be cheating on her boyfriend and if a female doctor or nurse did it it would be lesbianism. It got me so angry.

  2. it drives me mad that im too young to look after myself! and even worse is that if im still a virgin when I turn 25, ill have to wait even longer.

    Catherine x

  3. The glittery flannel story goes through my head every single time!

    At my last smear, it took longer for me to get undressed then it did for the lady to do the honours. Nice and quick and it'll save your life.


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