Wednesday, 27 May 2015

Guest Post, (TW, Self Harm)



I always love having guest posts on Big Fashionista, I am lucky enough to have a lot of readers who I interact with, both here and on Twitter, and I think if my blog can be used as a platform to spread awareness, then my blog door is always open for people to spread the word. If you haven't spoken to Olivia, who is todays guest poster, then you need to give her a follow, she is a lovely person who is always there to #ShareTheLove and make other people feel good. Sometimes, we forget that the people who always spend their time caring about others, need our time too.

If you are affected by what you read, and would like some help or someone to talk to, please contact,


The Samaritans 0845 790 9090

your local doctor. 





Let me pass you over to Olivia, so she can tell you her story, in her own words.

Big Fashionista x x





Hey lovely readers of Big Fashionista, it's Olivia from www.dungarees-and-donuts.co.uk and the lovely Kellie has let me guest post on her blog, which for is very exciting due to me being a long time reader of her blog, and I never thought I'd be guest blogging for her! 


So today I am going to talk about an issue which is close to my heart, I just have to warn you this post could be triggering and I don't want to upset anyone! The topic I am covering today is Self Harm, two big words that still manage to shock a lot of people. To me self harm is still a topic which is very much avoided by a lot of people but I am here to talk to you about my story and why it's important to talk about this issue. 




So first off, I just wanted to start by saying there is not just one way when it comes to self harming, there are SO many different ways that it can be done and people just assume there isn't. The key is in the name of what it is, causing harm to yourself. I am talking from experience where this issue is concerned and I had nobody to help me when it was such a big struggle in my life but at the time it seemed like it was my only way out, and although I am on the road to recovery there are still days when I struggle with the demon. I know there are so many people out there who struggle every single day with such a damaging thing. But I wanted to let you know there are ways through this and you will be ok, I promise you now. It's scary to think how little control you feel you have against yourself when it comes to self harm. For me it was a control thing, I felt like I had no control over my life and felt it was the only way to give myself some power back. 

For me it was about finding a way to give myself the feeling of power without hurting myself or anyone around me. Of course it was hard at first to find ways to get through it, I am not going to lie and said I changed over night because it's not that easy, but with each step forward I managed even longer without stepping back. There were two massive things that helped me through this pain, the first being talking, something as simple as saying to my friends- you know what I am really struggling today, help me. Was enough to distract me away from doing it to myself, having them there really saved me from myself. Secondly my blog, it's crazy to think a little place on the internet has saved me doing something like that to myself, taking my thoughts to the computer and writing out how I felt, it was like a safe haven for me, a place for me to vent and let it all out. 

There are other ways too, you can talk to professionals like your doctor or a nurse believe it or not they don't look at you like your crazy or lock you up and throw away the key, they just want to help and give you the best ways to go forward in this. If you feel like you can't face talking to them, take a friend- ask them to talk for you? Or even find a community online and open up to them about your struggles even if it's anonymous, you are talking and that's a HUGE step. Do not be ashamed to admit you need help, you'll be surprised how many people really are struggling. If you ever need a chat I am here for you, and I know for a fact Kel is too! Remember you are brave and you can beat this!

Love Olivia!

Find me at @_oliviajadexo





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5 comments

  1. What a great post - not easy to read but I am sure it will help others struggling with this. You are strong to come out and write about this and I utterly respect that. Well done Olivia and thanks to BF for hosting this post x

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    1. Thanks so much Jules, you're so kind. I hope more people are aware of this kind of thing! x

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  2. Thank you.... My "way" is to scratch myself until I "feel better", though I have gone furthet - latest Sundayvnight. My 17y/o niece's way is to cut herself - I've spent numerous hours in A&E with her, as her appropriate adult....that's a joke! Thank you. This is the first time I've admitted to anyone other than my niece that I do this - obviously my partner knows, but doesn't know how to stop me... Thank you for your honesty xx

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    1. I really hope everything is okay, I am proud of you for admitting this- you are such a strong lady, much love xxx

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  3. Great post I used to cut and burn myself for 2 years due to not coping well with a physically and emotionally abusive relationship. It was my way of coping. I still have days where I want to harm. Haven't for about .. wow 2 years now ! Thanks again for this post

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