Monday, 12 September 2016

Basic Bitch

"Oh, You are SO basic"

Excuse me while I put down my Pumpkin Spice Frappe to decide whether I give a fuck.

Thought about it. Don't give a damn.

BASIC, Am I meant to be offended?  I feel sorry for you because I can see straight through you.

The Official definition of a BASIC BITCH

Someone who is unflinchingly upholding of the status quo and stereotypes of their gender without even realizing it. She engages in typical, unoriginal behaviors, modes of dress, speech, and likes. She is tragically/laughably unaware of her utter lack of specialness and intrigue. She believers herself to be unique, fly, amazing, and a complete catch, when really she is boring, painfully normal, and par. She believes her experiences to be crazy, wild, and different or somehow more special than everything that everybody else is doing, when really, almost everyone is doing or has done the exact same thing. She is typical and a dime a dozen. There are many subtypes of basicness, such as the basic ratchet, the basic sorority bitch, the basic groupie bitch, the basic I'm-so-Carrie-from-Sex-and-the-City bitch, etc, but ultimately, they all share the common thread of being expendable and unnoteworthy and, in some cases, having absolutely no redeeming qualities.

Oh, yawn, here it is, another way to judge woman and their lifestyle choices. 

Like Pumpkin Spice Lattes? Oh God, you are so BASIC. 

Lover of all things Snapchat and wearing the flower crown filter? Girl, you just scream BASIC. 

You like breathing AIR? Girl, you are the most basic bitches of all the basic bitches. How DARE YOU, you basically basic, basic air breather. 

You LIKE THINGS THAT OTHER PEOPLE LIKE? Like food, watching TV and seeing your girlfriends for lunch and other BASIC THINGS like that? Let me just take a second to try to put you into a small stereotypical box by calling you a name, borne out of my desire to make myself feel better about myself by making it seem as if I am better than you. 

So call me basic, I don't take it personally, because we as women cannot win. If we follow the crowd, we are basic, if we do something "different" we think we are Special Snowflakes and need to be taken down a peg or two. WE JUST CANNOT WIN. 

It is such a LAZY insult as well. If you are going to call someone basic, here is a tip, next time, DON'T. Instead, say what you REALLY think. Go up to that person and look them in the eyes and say what you really mean, which is, I am BETTER THAN YOU, because that is BASICALLY what you are saying. 


Don't you agree? 



  1. At it's heart, this is incredibly sad - that women are actually taking the time and energy to invent new ways to insult other women. But it actually made me laugh so much! I'd probably be bargain-basement basic - but I have much better things to do than even give a flying fuck?

    1. Totally. It's frustrating as hell. But I'm too busy being me to give a DAMN

  2. Shouldn't it be 'am I supposed to be offended?' Not 'I'm I...?'

  3. Ha! Someone once told me that their style was 'shabby chic' while mine was just 'shitty chic'. She would SO use the basic insult too.

  4. I'm such a basic bitch and I love it! Too busy enjoying my coffee in my matte lipstick and new shoes on to care haha x

  5. Firstly, what an awful insult.
    Secondly, hoorah for your post on it. It makes me so mad that everyone is leaping to judge us for absolutely anything, wtf is wrong with the world?

  6. Kellie,

    Another post that I completely agree with. I absolutely detest snobs. I mean, truly despise. Even moths and wasps have a purpose (which I will grudgingly admit to), but what is the purpose of a snob? Actually, their purpose is probably to remind normal, nice people how easy it is become a complete, self-interested, self-obsessed cunt. It's one thing to 'sell yourself', but it's another thing to deal in the currency of putting others down to make yourself feel bigger and better, when in fact you're right. They're not big enough to admit the truth - they think they're better than you because they were there in 1972 when the pumpkin spiced latte was invented. They were there when the latest trends first hit the catwalks of Milan and Paris. They were there when the band you like first played that great record that's being caned on the radio. (Yes, I'm paraphrasing LCD Soundsystem, because I was there when James first tried his hand at music production in a dingy NYC studio).

    Anyway, when we do finally meet, I'll be having a pumpkin spiced latte, and hopefully I'll fucking love it.


  7. shouldn't it be judge women not "judge woman" and their lifestyle choices?

  8. This made me LOL!! I'm a bit ashamed to admit this but I never knew what "basic" in the slang sense meant! I've seen it flying around on memes but I'm so old and not cool enough that I never understand these sayings and have to ask other people all the time! haha. Anyway you taught me something today, so thank you :-)

    I must say that I am also probably defined as a basic bitch but who cares - I certainly don't! I love my lattes, brunch and IKEA Malm dresser that everyone else has so who cares if I'm basic, I'm also happy!

    Leah x


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